wouldnt work HH these kookaburras are Gourmets only eat meat
Ma Wife & I went fur a BBQ at ra locoal Nashunal pairk on ra shores aw ra bewdaful Sinney Hairber. Ra Nashunal pairks fowk provide gas fired BBQs free, as a result the park is verra popular wi scoats migrants, but ah digress. Thase Barbies licht wi a quiet wumff, can be heard at aw aw 3 fit by a human & 3 miles if ye have speshully attuned hearing licht a kookaburra.
Ah lit the Barbie & slung oan sam snags (sosijis) & a daud aw steak, ah then noticed three Kookies had arreeved in a nearby gum tree hiding ahint branches & leaves & keeking oot tae see hoo the steak wuz cumin along. Bugger the snags thae kookies ur gourmets!
Ah pit the steak oan ma plate & sat doon…..Doon swooped Kookie wan grabbed the end aw ma steak & pulled…… luckily ma reactions on food ur lightning fast!!! Ah speared the steak wi ma foark , also speared the paper plate & the widen table unnerneath. So here wiz Kooky wan pullin like hell oan the steak & me oan the ither end & beatin it aboot the beak with the flat aw ma knife. Eventually he goat the messij & took aff, meanswhile I wiz keeping a close eye on Kookies twa & three! Ah built a barricade aw esky (cooler boax) & and picnic boax etc tae bugger up thaer angle aw attack & wiz enjoying ma steak wi mair than hauf ane eye on thae three robbin bastirts. Had near finished ma steak, cut last bit intae twa mooth size bits, speared wan bit wi ma foark when Kooky fower attacked frae ra rear. Ra bugger flew between ma wife & me at a hunner miles an oor, clipping me on lug wi his wing oan the wey thru. Had the steak aff the plate, wi oot slowin, & wiz aff. Ah wiz oafferin a few gentil obsairvaishuns oan his parentage & his sexual habits when Kooka five, dived atween us an tuik the last piece aw steak aff ma foark also fleein at ower a hunner miles an oor. All five aw thae bastirts then sat on a tree branch & laffed ther fool heids aff.
This aw despite a notus oan ra table that said “DO NOT FEED THE WILDLIFE” They bastirts oabviously canna read!!!