by The Creeping Spleen » Thu Aug 12, 2021 11:28 am
Wee Sammy goes out for a night on the tiles with the lads. They go from pub to pub, having a couple of pints here and a couple there, and eventually winding up at a party in a posh looking house.
Sammy wakes up the next morning on a park bench with no clue how he got there. He pats himself down and discovers his wallet's missing, but he kind of remembers taking it out at the party.
Still feeling as rough as a badgers arse, Sammy starts wandering the streets, hoping to see a landmark he recognises. The only thing he can remember about the house where the party was, was it had a red front door and a golden toilet.
After a while, the streets start to look familiar, and he spots a posh looking house with a red door.
He smartens himself up as best he can, and knocks on the door.
A snooty looking middle aged woman answers, "Can I help you?"
"Um, I hope so." says Sammy, "Is this the house with the golden toilet?"#
The woman looks at him as if he's something nasty she's just scraped off her shoe, turns and calls into the house, "Henry! This is the wee bastard that pished in your tuba!"
Another sunrise with my sad captains, with who I choose to lose my mind,
And if it's all we only pass this way but once, what a perfect waste of time.